salmon_pink: (Hypno)
[personal profile] salmon_pink
Title: Porky
Fandom: Disney (Toy Story)
Pairing: Hamm/Andy
Rating: R
Words: 898
Notes: Voyeurism. For a prompt at the [livejournal.com profile] disney_kink meme.
A/N: I told myself I wasn't going to look at any more [livejournal.com profile] disney_kink prompts until I'd gone back and finished all the ones I started before life got in the way. Clearly I am weak. Also, I have no idea what this fic even is, other than messed up.
Summary: Hamm had never been the favourite, but now he was the only one left to watch Andy grow older.



Hamm was never the favourite. He understood that. Cowboy dolls, space ranger action figures, those were the toys that got to be favourites. Toys with voice boxes and flashing lights and a tv show hanging off their vinyl shoulders.

Hamm was a piggybank. Piggybanks weren’t the favourites.

But they were useful.

Which was why Hamm got to hold on to Andy longer than any of the others.

It was kind of a selfish thought, but Hamm had never had much of a problem with being selfish. He’d always been good at looking out for himself.

The truth was, piggybanks weren’t toys. Not really. And maybe that had always been there, at the back of his mind. Like he was just waiting for Andy to realise that him playing with a piggybank made about as much sense as playing with a coin purse.

But Andy was a special kid, the kind who could take a piggybank and turn him into a world-class super villain with just a slightly lowered voice and a snazzy bowler hat.

Man, Potatohead used to get pissed about Hamm using his hat during playtime.

But playtime was long passed.

Hamm got to watch as, one by one, toys were sold off or given away. A core group remained, but even they weren’t safe from the passage of time, and eventually the day came when even Woody and Buzz were thrown in the chest with the Potatoheads, Rex, Slink, Jessie, Bullseye and the aliens.

But Hamm stayed on the shelf.

Because Hamm was useful.

Hamm got to watch Andy continue to grow older from the comfort of his spot above Andy’s desk, whereas the others could only sneak their stolen glances while Andy slept.

Most importantly, Hamm got to be held.

Hamm still wasn’t the favourite. But he was the only one who got that kind of attention from Andy.

The only one to be paid attention. The worst one to be paid attention.

The others, they didn’t seem to realise what it meant that Andy was growing up. Some were too naïve, some were just too stubborn to acknowledge it, too determined to stand by their role as a child’s toy.

But Hamm wasn’t a toy. Not really.

So Hamm very much understood what it meant that Andy was growing up. He understood the growth spurts, measured them by the size of Andy’s hands as they cradled him, shaking him lightly to hear the chime of coins inside.

Hamm understood what it meant when Andy began to squirm and shiver in his sleep, when he blushed bright red in the mornings and dragged the sheets down to the laundry basket. Hamm understood what it meant when Andy began to curl up under the covers and bite at the pillow to muffle his groans, steady rhythmic motion of his hands moving against fabric the only other sound in the eerie silence. Hamm understood what it meant when Andy began keeping tissues and lotion in his bedside drawer and when he began to hide magazines under his mattress.

Hamm understood oh so well, and his eyes began to follow Andy’s hands, the lazy everyday movements of them. Tapping a pencil against the desk as he sketched. Digging his nail into the peel of a satsuma. Tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear or scratching at the freckles that covered his nose.

Hamm knew what those hands did, and that was his knowledge alone, and Andy was his alone, and he still wasn’t the favourite but none of that mattered any more.

By the time Andy’s palm was wide enough to cover Hamm’s entire belly, he was having to bite down on the urge to squirm in Andy’s grip. Andy would jiggle him lightly, coins clinking together and then sometimes, just sometimes, Andy would have a new coin, something he trusted Hamm to hold on to for him.

Andy shouldn’t have trusted Hamm. Shouldn’t have, couldn’t have known the thoughts that crossed Hamm’s mind when Andy held up a new shiny silver nickel or quarter. Couldn’t have known the way Hamm would picture Andy at his desk, sprawled back against his computer chair with his drawstring sleep pants pushed low on his hips, hands moving obscenely between his legs. The same hands that held Hamm, slid coins into his slot, made Hamm feel hot and breathless and so very much not like a toy.

Sure, he knew that even though he wasn’t a toy, he would still cease to be useful one day. Andy had his own bank account, ordered things online, had less and less need for small change.

But those extra years that Hamm got to share with Andy were years the others spent trapped in that chest, not seeing what Andy had become, not seeing what it meant.

Not appreciating this next stage in Andy’s life, not in the way Hamm appreciated it.

And it was kind of a selfish thought, but Hamm had never had much of a problem with being selfish, especially if it meant keeping this side of Andy to himself. He may not have been Andy’s favourite, but Andy was Hamm’s favourite.

So Hamm sat on his shelf, with his perfect view of Andy’s new life, watching Andy’s hands.

And sometimes, just sometimes, sneaking a coin from his belly to leave somewhere it could be found, nice and easy.

Date: 04/07/2011 22:26 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] promisemewings.livejournal.com
LOL, I don't know what I'm thinking when I make these prompts, but I LOVE when people fill them! I never know what to expect!

But yeah, excellent job!

Date: 04/07/2011 22:31 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
With this one, I didn't know what to expect. I just started writing, thinking it would be weird crack, but Voyeur!Hamm actually got a little dark and creepy there as well. But mostly this is just nuts, and I thank you for inspiring it.

And I loved all your prompts - the variety and the insanity and the way you use an appropriate fandom icon each time! XD

Date: 05/07/2011 06:29 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runic-binary.livejournal.com
I want you to know that my finger hovered over the "new tab" option for literally over a minute out of paralyzed, uncontrollable curiosity just demanding that I find out what the hell was going on under this cut.

And I have to say, under the category of the many, many things that have potentially scarred me for life, this was certainly among the most well-written.

Date: 05/07/2011 21:13 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
Yeah, this isn't exactly something my brain would have produced on its own, but when I saw that prompt I totally snort-laughed for a good few minutes and walked away, only to find I couldn't stop thinking about the challenge of it. It basically demanded I try, and who am I to argue with such a relentless plot bunny...? ;)

Although I do apologise for potentially scarring you for life. You're free to cyber-spank me over that.

Date: 05/07/2011 21:22 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runic-binary.livejournal.com
I am no stranger to the rabid plot bunny. The difference between us is that you are a far braver soul than I, and post this shit under your name.

...And I'll cyber-spank you anytime you want, baby hey you walked into that okay

Date: 05/07/2011 21:30 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
I don't know if 'brave' is the right word - 'shameless' might be more fitting. XD

Oh you. ;)

Date: 05/07/2011 21:50 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runic-binary.livejournal.com
Surprisingly interchangeable, those two. I have little in the way of shame myself, to be perfectly honest - it's just that my roommate reads my blog, and I don't want to have to put up with him side-eyeing me until I can come up with something he's written that's worse than underage incest to fend him off with.

Date: 05/07/2011 21:53 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
Very true. I think it does make it easier for me to post stuff like this, the fact that I've never shared my LJ or online identity with anybody I have to look in the eye. It's very ... freeing.

Date: 05/07/2011 22:07 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runic-binary.livejournal.com
Yeah. I mean, I really don't mind letting him see my bad fanfic and everything - hell, he betas a lot of it for me - it's just that in some instances it'll be like, say, I specifically tell him I'm not going to write something, and then...do it anyway. And don't post it. Out of stubbornness. :|

Date: 05/07/2011 22:25 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
Yeah, I really get that. The stubbornness bit especially. You say something, you change your mind, but because you said it out loud to somebody else there's suddenly a weird pressure there to live up to your original statement. I'm the same way but for the vice-versa situation - if I tell somebody I'm going to write something, even if I've already started it and really like writing it, suddenly I find it harder and harder to work on, because of that weird pressure.

Date: 05/07/2011 22:43 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runic-binary.livejournal.com
I get that way too. That's why I don't "claim" prompts; I just write and post. The last time I did claim something was like three months ago aaaand it's not done yet. *guilt*

Date: 05/07/2011 22:50 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
Yep, same here. I might say, for instance, that a prompt at a meme is awesome but I won't commit to even attempting it, even if I've already opened the Word document to give it a try. It's the reason I avoid fests and other deadlines, because I can't write under pressure and then there's the guilt and then the guilt just becomes another kind of pressure and I just can't. I have huge admiration for people who can write to deadlines - I struggled enough with that at school, I can't even imagine bringing that into something I consider a fun hobby. :I

Date: 05/07/2011 22:56 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] runic-binary.livejournal.com
I know. I'd love to write professionally, but the deadlines...hahaha, yeah, no.

Date: 05/07/2011 08:17 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sandileina.livejournal.com
I can't say it better than runic_binary. I actually deleted the email that told me this was put up, because of the Disney tag. xD;; *not overall a Disney fan, barring delicious wonderful Pixar*

But then a couple of minutes later I was like, uh, well, yeah. Could give it a go, since at least I'll know who the characters are, as opposed to your Justice League stuff which I'm sure is delicious, but is a foreign world to me lol.

Anyway. This. Yes. This didn't scar me for life since even as a child I never liked Toy Story (having said that, I heart TS2 ridiculously), so I just plain loved it. xD

Great to see you writing again! Keep it up!

Date: 05/07/2011 21:17 (UTC)
From: [identity profile] salmon-pink.livejournal.com
Thanks so much hun, for reading and for the encouragement. It feels incredibly good to be writing again - I always forget how much I miss it.

Ah man, I love Pixar so damn much. I kind of marathoned the TS trilogy over the last few days (been a bit rundown and I always find the best thing for that is to watch a film that gives me an excuse to cry and then wraps everything up with some happy closure) and I swear it doesn't matter how long it's been since I last watched a Pixar film or how many times I've seen it, it's always like coming home to an old friend.

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